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Thursday, September 29, 2005

The Sheehan Bunch

The Sheehan Bunch©

(With major apologies to The Brady Bunch and nothing but respect for Sherwood Schwartz, a sit-com genius)

It's the story of an attention-seeking lady
Who went way, way, way, way off the deep end.
With misplaced emotional cause and effect,
It was far beyond any rational mend.

It's the story of her anti-U.S. groupies,
Seeking more than their fifteen minutes of fame.
None of them had any solid, proactive ideas
What they offered was impotent and lame.

Til the one day when the lady met a camera,
With willing media that had a sneaking hunch,
To cover her story ad infinitum and ad nauseum
That's the way they all became the Sheehan Bunch!

The Sheehan Bunch.
The Sheehan Bunch.
That's the way they all became The Sheehan Bunch.

With Bill Maher portraying Ann B. Davis as Alice


Today's episode: Bill helps boyfriend Sam The Butcher case his salami.

Scene: The Sheehan Bunch Back Yard

Bill: Oh Sam! That's the biggest salami I've ever seen!
(Cue Moderate laugh track)
Sam: Just wait until you see the casing that goes on it, honey!
(Cue Huge laugh track)
Cindy (Enters): Republicans are all warmongers.
Jesse: There, there. Hey, I see a camera!
Dan: Why look, here comes Reverend Sharpton!
Rev Al: Hallelujah everybody! I sense a celebrity factor spike. How can I get in on thi...I mean, how can I help?
Bill: Well, Sam wants me to help him case his salami and...
Cindy: I think he was talking to me.
Joan: No, I think he was talking to me.
Baba: No, I think he was talking to me!
(Cue Wild laugh track)
Cindy: I think he was speaking to Joan.
Baba: Everything is always Joan, Joan, Joan! You like her best.
Cindy: That's not true!
(Cue Moderate laugh track)
Al: Uhhh, is anyone going to men-men-men-mention the li-li-lies this White House tells?
Baba: Here comes my boyfriend, George. George Glass!
George: Um, Soros, not Glass. This certainly is a rather bland, middle class neighborhood. Why aren't there any Bentleys in the driveways?
Rev Al: I was speaking to the pretty lady.
Baba: See, he was talking to me.
Joan: No, he meant me!
Bill: No, he meant me!
(Cue Wild laugh track)
Al: Ahhhh...ahhhh...urrr...ummm....are-are-is....ahhhh...
Dan: I think Al is having a stroke!
Joan: No, he's trying to complete a lucid thought.
Baba: What's that?
Jesse: What is that...'lucid'?
Cindy: I don't know what that is.
Dan: It's courage. Ummm, no, strike that.
George: I'm buying this whole block and turning it into a poppy field.
Sam: Hey, are you all gonna stand around gabbing? Who's gonna help me case my salami?
(Cue Wild laugh track)
Fade To Black


Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Byrd To Flap Wings "One More Time"

...The Klansman...

...Runneth Againneth.


When Ball Peen Hammers...

Six year old doesn't have to 'do time' in butter knife - school issue.

Ball Peen Hammer

Take Care Cali!

Cali Fires Here. And Here.

Tom DeLay

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Doom: The Movie

I always wondered how long it would be before the movie version of Doom was brought to the screen. Well, it hits the screens in October.

I spent endless, endless hours playing Doom2 beginning in 1995. Sleepless nights fighting the insidious monsters that "id" created. What joy! What fun!

I always wondered which actor would play Sarge, figuring the likely action heroes of Ah-nold, or Jean Claude Van Damme, or perhaps Bruce Willis. Or even Warren Beatty (hee-yuck, hee-yuck, hee-yuck - sorry old man. That's just a joke).

But they got "The Rock" - and damn if that isn't perfect casting for the role. If the movie follows the game closely, it'll be a hotdamn rockin' good time.


Stuff is Coming

There is STUFF coming down the pike. Work has been a four letter word (in a good way) but it has impacted the time I'm able to spend on the blog (Mr. Soros, do you hear me? How about a donation for a small-time, Right Wingy blogger like me?) Yeah, and the Pope is Jewish, Fat Bastard is thin, and Rosie O'Moo is heterosexual. Uh huh. Yeah. And Gore won the 2000 election.

I'll be back!

When Ball Peen Hammers are Outlawed...

...only Outlaws will have Ball Peen Hammers!

The Saga continues friends, only this time, The Object D' Kill is a Grilling Fork.

Belated RIP Agent 86

Rest In Peace to Don Adams, who made the phrase "Would you believe..." a household standard.

Don Adams
(No photo copyright infringement intended. Used solely for the purpose of honoring the deceased.)

Monday, September 26, 2005

Ishtar disses Terminator

Ishtar disses The Governator.

You know, Beatty has two atrocious box office bombs to his credit; Ishtar and Town & Country.
I guess this allows Mr. Beatty to be a political critic?

I'm waiting for "Ishtar 2: Town & Country". Done with the screenplay Warren?

China Continues Restricting Bloggers

I'm sure, if they could, the Libs and the Sheehan crowd would Like the same thing to happen to us.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

So, Fat Bastard, Have You Lost Those 12 Pounds?

Hey, FAT BASTARD time's up, have you lost those pounds that any other person could lose simply by doing what we learned in High School Health Class: Diet and Exercise? That's $1,266.66 per pound ($3,800 per week x 4 weeks / 12 pounds). I gotta give it to Pritikin-there's a sucker born every minute. In Chubbsy Wubbsy's case, a FAT, FAT SUCKER!

ViQueens Win One

ViQueens Beat NO.

Well, we must Have a Taxpayer Subsidized Stadium Now! I mean, we can't expect multi-multi millionaires to pay for it all by themselves, can we? God no! Heaven forbid!

At 23 years old the Metrodome is an antiquated, outdated, relic just falling apart at the seams.

On a personal note, there are two sports I care nothing, absolutely nothing, about: Football and baseball (Please don't hold that against me, Nick). I cheer whenever the ViQueens lose, and root for the Twins to lose as well.

It's hockey and golf that matter, baby, and don't let anyone else tell 'ya it's any different.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Liberals ASSert: Bush Back Boozing

Just how low can the Left sink, huh? Pretty low, as always.

Exactly where were these same people while Bubba chopped out Caterpillar lines on a mirror during his eight years in the White House.

Yeah, that highly rated, Pulitzer Prize winning, pantheon of journalism the National Enquirer is their source. Man, that's really digging deep, isn't it?

It's funny though, isn't it; listening to the Air(head) America talking heads exasperate themselves with this tawdry tidbit of tabloidism.

Nattering Nabobs of Negativism. Yep!
Thirty-five years ago Vice President Spiro Agnew used that phrase to describe the Liberal Liberaces. Hey, Libs, are you proud of your thirty-five year plus tenure of negativism? Wear it proudly as your party atrophies and rapidly sinks evermore into extinction.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Jim-mah Kah-ter Says...

Jim-mah says is kind of like the child's game "Simon Says", but the difference is, playing "Simon" is fun. With Jim-mah...it's just pathetic.

Jim-mah says Bush lost the 2000 election. Yeah, that's sure a good fight to keep fighting, isn't it? Kinda like chewing your food twice (that last sentence may take a while for the slow Lib's to "get", but maybe a dog, cat, or rock will be kind enough to explain it to them).

Jim-mah says The 2004 election was stolen. Yeah, okay Mr. Peanut.

Jim-mah says he is critical of FEMA.

Jim-mah says Hugo Chavez was legitimately elected.

All this from the man who Was Emasculated during the Iran Hostage Crisis, who was UNABLE to do anything to free 52 American Hostages for 444 days!

Jim-mah...Shut yo' face!

Cluck Schumer Office Illegally Obtains Credit Report

The office of The Cluckster obtained the Credit Bureau Report of Republican Michael Steele illegally. This, my friends, is a felony.

Cluck Schumer

Hear Cluck Here!

"There needs to be an investigation...there needs to be an investigation...there needs to be an investigation. This must be investigated. This must be investigated. This must be investigated. We need to get to the bottom of this. We need to get to the bottom of this."

More on Clucky's devious staffers here.

What did you know and when did you know it, Cluck? Did you order this devious, underhanded, search Clucky? "There needs to be an investigation..."

And More Here.


Hector, Mix and Match!

Take the painkillers with a beer or other adult beverage and you'll WANT to blog. Take care, my friend.

Belfast Pedophile

The U.S. has them and other countries Have them too.

How do you deal with people like this? I've said if before; a hollow point to the head.

Baby Stabbed by Playstation Playing Uncle

This is not good. This is...sick .

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Bubba Rubbas

Bubba Rubbas...Clinton Condoms...call 'em what you want. Why, I thought Bubba "didn't have sexual relations..." with anyone other than MrsSatan? Why would he need rubbas?

I hear the Bubba Rubbas come (get your mind out of the gutter!) in three sizes: small, extra small, and Bubba Teeny Weeny Weenie Sized.

However, even when used as instructed, they do not protect blue dresses from splotches. Even the tiniest prick will put a hole in them.

Wear them with pride Bubba...perhaps on your nose?

The New Squad

We had the "Mod Squad", "Police Squad", and now..."The Porn Squad".

"Hey! Hey you with the handcuffs, ball gag, and latex wrap, up against the wall."

I guess you wouldn't necessarily want to tell the perp to "spread 'em", now, would you?

I wonder if there is any coincidence that this story and the Bubba Rubba story both broke on the same day? Coincidence? I don't think so.

I Will Blog No More, Forever

Actually, that title is completely and totally false (perhaps to the dismay of some who dislike my political views), but it sounds good, doesn't it? It seems like I've been away from the keyboard for a year, and it was only Sunday that I updated, albeit a "Mooching" piece, which I really like doing. When I find things I like by other bloggers, heck, I want everyone to read it.

Not that it's any yeoman effort (I didn't work up a sweat) or something extraordinary, but all the blogs that I link to (on the Right side of the page) are blogs that I've read for a while, liked them very much, and linked to them. I don't subscribe to an RSS feed, perhaps someday. So I can say, without fanfare, that you could close your eyes and scroll the mouse down the right side of the page and blindly click on any of the blog links, and you wouldn't be disappointed. Not one bit.

I haven't had the time to update as much and as frequently as I'd like. So if you are kind enough to visit here, and I go a day or two without updating (the Liberal Liberaces are probably ecstatic when that happens), hit the links on the right. Hit the political links and the non-political links as well. They're all good.

Honestly, I've never corresponded with so many nice people, so many people with good ideas, answering a technical question I may have had or a blog question - as I have since I began this blog. They truly are a fine group of good folks, and I'm glad I found them and link to them. And I appreciate those that have linked back, and those who've mentioned or linked to something they've read here.

I Will Blog No More, Forever? Not A Chance!

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

The Death Season

I hate this time of year. I call it The Season of Death. Summer ends, autumn approaches. The sun sets earlier and earlier. The leaves soon will begin their colorful death as they are choked off the life support of tree branches. The weather gets colder. The sky becomes grey. Why do so many people say that fall is their favorite season. It's the Death Season.

Do you notice people become increasingly more crabby this time of year? Watch for it. They do.

I love summer. It's the only season. It should be summer year round, always, forever.

Damn, September is almost over which leaves only three more months to the year!

Okay - I'm going to say it really, really, really EARLY, so remember you read it here first, and I mean it:


Go ahead, blink. Boom! It's 2006!

Two Depressing Songs

I actually like both of these songs very much. It's just that when I hear them, I end up feeling depressed and morose, in a very severe way:

That would be This Song.

And This One.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Mooching...But It's all Good

Nothing today but the wonderful mooching of other blogs!

Alison Lapper statue nekkid and pregnant. Hat Tip to Lemuel at the soon to be deleted This Blog Will Be Deleted Tomorrow. Lemuel also writes an excellent post
responding to a "Che Head". When will Che lovers wake up and smell the gun powder?

Zombieslayer notes America's Dirty Secret.

Beaten dog shoots owner, located at Dread Pundit Bluto
HERE. I say: Good for the Dog!

Flight 93 and the Crescent controversy at The Spanktuary.

Jimmy Pete contributes to the Katrina aftermath, as only Two Dogs at Mean Ol' Meaney can do.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Cereal Box Bank Statement?

"Huh? Bank statement? What bank statement?" Well, that's usually because there's a fun things to do or read on the back of the cereal box. Things like jokes, prizes, helping Cap'n Crunch sail his ship, or the Rabbit get some Trik. "Hmmmm, let's see, there's a debit here for $13.63 but no explanation. Did I hit my overdraft protection?" Hell, gimme the cereal box every time.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Rove Controls Weather?

Secret and classified documents show that Karl Rove has obtained a weather control machine. Accusations from many liberals and moderate democrats have initiated an investigation. Roves' acquiring of the weather control machine is sketchy, but informants say that Rove bought the machine from someone named 'Evil' or 'Dr. Evil'.

The machine reportedly
costs upwards of $100 Billion dollars. If this story turns out to be true, Rove will be one of only five people in the world who possess a weather control device. The Russians have never denied owning a weather control device. Some say that, when in a stupor, George Soros will openly brag about owning a weather control machine. The others are speculative, but include Bill Gates and your local meteorologist or weather-person.

Mr. Rove could not be reached at his isolated mansion on a hill, with its dark, winding
entrance road, with periodic flashes of lightening.


Kazaa Saga Kontinues; Affects Penn State

Again, the oft-repeated three words are uttered: Free Music Downloads.

Robert Wise, RIP

"The Andromeda Strain", "Star Trek: The Motion Picture", "Somebody Up There Likes Me", "The Day The Earth Stood Still".... All Directed by This Man who passed away yesterday, September 14.

Read More Here. And Here.

Death Sentence for Australian Embassy Terrorist

Achmad Mohamed Hasan sentenced to death.

    Hasan admitted he was involved in the plot that led to the deaths of 10 innocent people when a car bomb blew up outside the Australian embassy just over a year ago. But after Wednesday's verdict, he said he didn't believe he deserved the death penalty."

Death by Firing Squad.

    In the prison van waiting to take him to jail, Hasan confessed to some responsibility for the bombing deaths of 11 people, including a 16-year-old schoolgirl. "I'm a little bit guilty," he said, "but it (the sentence) doesn't fit with what I did.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

U.N. Lowers Its Expectations

Don't look to the U.N. to apply high standards for itself or seek too altruistic goals. Lower your expectations (if possible) on what the U.N. is capable.

The Always Defiant Kofi Annan
You see, the U.N. is kind of like your local school board. In fact, that's basically what the U.N. is, a hideously populated, inefficient, decidedly liberal slanting, red-tape nightmarish school board. As the U.N. continues to atrophy, much like Liberalism, we await the arrival when we will be free from these maladies.

Pine Nut Crop Forecast Good!

And a Strong Pine Nut Crop will keep bears away from consuming humans. At least that's what the strong pine nut crop is supposed to do. My advice? Sprinkle hash oil all over the pine nuts.

Marriage: Nebraska Style

This is...so sad and...words just fail me.
Yeah...and...Crystal is 14.

Step Right Up To Bubba's Freak and Sideshow!

So the former fornicator of the White House, Bubba, is simply a Carnival Barker? Well we knew it all along, didn't we?
Just a little bit of advice, don't drink the Kool Aid Bubba will be selling at his Sideshow Stand.

Will Bubba's Sideshow make This Guy jealous?

Mister Reno will be performing "Feats of Strength"!

Mr. Internet will be at the Sideshow performing "My Tall Tales", Daily at 2PM and 5:30PM

Each day, The Sideshow concludes with MrsSatan and her Halo inspiring performance of "I Will Rule You!"


Bubba, a Carny. Better put some ice on that.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

AAA Buys AA and Sponsors AA

Triple A, the automotive roadside assistance giant, today purchased Air(head) America and also will be the primary sponsor of Alcoholics Anonymous. The purchase was greeted as a magnificent coup by the business world.

"I suspected for quite some time that this was coming, but I wasn't sure if it would happen this year," said Jim McJim, President and CEO of McJim Financial Securities, Inc. According to McJim, this friendly takeover will create a dynasty of "letter A" corporations, as well as permit the new corporation to be the first listing in every yellow pages directory across the nation.

"It will be virtually impossible to top the yellow pages listing in being the first name listed," explained McJim. "After all, they now will be listed as AAAAAAA, and who's going to be able to do them one better than that?"

Investment banker Dr. Leather Hockleer, of Hockleer and Associates agrees. "AAAAAAA is almost certain to be on the top of the list in all business and yellow pages directory listings. They have guaranteed themselves decades, if not centuries, as the number one, top listed corporation in this regard," said Hockleer.

McJim concurs with his colleague. "If, at some point in the future, AAAAAAA buys ABC, and then becomes AAAAAAAABC, there will be no stopping their listing power. No one will ever best them," said McJim.

Monday, September 12, 2005

L.A. and Melbourne Targeted by Terrorists

A man believed to be an al-Qaida member called for attacks on Los Angeles and Melbourne, Australia. The man is believed to be Adam Yahiye Gadahn, an American from California.

    "Yesterday, London and Madrid. Tomorrow, Los Angeles and Melbourne, Allah willing. And this time, don't count on us demonstrating restraint and compassion," the man says during the 11-minute tape."

The tape is pending authentication.

MrsSatan Pipes Up

MrsSatan spouts off on Katrina and The President.

Clinton's Mythical FEMA, a must read.

MrsSatan: "I will Rule You!"

Sunday, September 11, 2005

September 11

9-11 Remembrance. And Here. Here's another.

I had a link to a picture (pre-devastation) of the World Trade Towers for this item. Either the link changed or its photographer had a hissy fit of it being used without permission, and I understand that. But look, I don't make any money from this blog. It's pure non-profit. You'd think the free exposure and publicity would be welcome, but I guess not. So, the photo is gone from this site. But imagine as you read this, those two, wonderful twin towers still standing here because that is what you should be seeing instead of reading this, but apparently the creative genius sayeth 'not'.

Here. The Nation Mourns. More Here. And Here.

Victoria and David Beckham Rendered "Pointless"

No, really, I'm not making it up. Also rendered pointless: Prime Minister Tony Blair and everyone who's ever appeared on 'Big Brother'.

Humiliation Punishment for Drinking and Driving

Humiliation for Driving and Drinking.

    'Society has decided that drunk drivers are problem - they spread death and destruction, and it is the newspaper's task to involve itself,' wrote Wedel in an editorial.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Largest Flying Animal Ever

Fossils reveal largest flying animal ever!

Reasons for its disappearance are only slightly speculative.


Stronger Beer!

Stronger Beer. Much stronger Beer! Cheers!

    "People will only be able to drink two or three glasses, otherwise they'll drop like flies." "Everyone who tries it is enthusiastic."

Holy (Bleep)! More South Park!

Three more years of S.P. This is good.

Friday, September 09, 2005

Katrina vs Sheehan















Another Brick In The Gorelick Wall

The Happiest Days of Our Lives / Another Brick In The Wall Part 2
by S.T. Miller

(with profuse apologies for and to Another Brick In The Wall by Pink Floyd)

As Sung by Jamie Gorelick

When we grew up and went to D.C.
There was a certain President that we had to protect in any way we could.
By erecting a barrier between agencies to everything he did
Preventing exposure of misconduct, however recklessly committed by the "Comeback Kid".
But in the town, it was well known when he got home at night, his cankled and psychopathic wife would thrash him to within inches of his life...

We don't need no intelligence sharing.
We are practicing damage control.
No dark secrets about the Chinese
FBI! Leave 'the Kid' alone.
Hey! FBI, leave 'the Kid' alone!
All in all it's just another brick in the Gorelick Wall
All in all it's just another brick in the Gorelick Wall

(repeat Chorus)

Wrong! Terrorists strike again!
If you don't share intelligence , you can't have any impeachment.
How can you have impeachment if you don't share intelligence?
You! Yes, Sandy Burglar, what's in your pants, Laddy?

©2005 S.T. Miller

Sean Penns' Not-So-Swift Boat

"Shanghai Surprise 2: Electric Boogaloo"

Mr. Hand: Spicoli, Spicoli, Spicoli, you wouldn't be in this predicament if you had paid attention during boat safety class.

Spicoli: What?!! I gotta little water here... Anyone got one of those extra-absorbent paper towels handy?

Mr. Hand: Oh Mr. Spicoli, liberals always fail in disaster management.


Clinton Cookbook Profits to Help Katrina Victims

By S.T. Miller - mrssatan news service

Little Rock, Arkansas - Bubba and MrsSatan announced today that profits from their "Clinton C(r)ook Book" will be donated to families affected by hurricane Katrina. "The 'r' after the 'C' in the title was my idea," chuckled the former President who received a swift elbow to the kidneys from his wife, MrsSatan.

The meals are some of the favorites of both Clintons, and include:

Intern Surprise, Bananas Vince Foster, Most Ethical Administration Ever Caesar Salad, Pardon Me Mashed Potatoes, Buddhist Temple Cabbage Rolls, Waco Hot Tamales, Return To Sender Cuban Sandwich, Vast Right Chicken Hotwing Conspiracy, and their succulent dessert Terrormisu

©2005 S.T. Miller for mrssatan.blogspot.com

Thursday, September 08, 2005

The Katrina Blame Game

Those who are the first to level unfounded accusations often harbor and possess the same...Inadequacies or inferiority complexes...as the accusations they project. And they often say what they say from only a knee-jerk reaction. Logic doesn't play a part in how they discern what they speak. "Forward the agenda at any cost...use, abuse and exploit any situation for furthering the Politburo."

It didn't take long for the Cause Celeb Crowd to finger point at Bush, Cheney, Rove, Rice- you know, the whole Wu-Tang DClan. However, the same point the finger crowd ignore Gov. Kathleen Babineaux Blanco told the White House it would have to wait for her decision on its proposal. Then she told them her answer was no.

Oh. I see. And somehow the results of a natural disaster are blamed on Bush? Oh, I see - I believe that's called (misdirected) Transference. No, actually it's how the Left works. Here's more from Governor Blanco:

    After huddling with her advisers late into the night Friday and again Saturday morning, she rejected a White House proposal to consolidate the National Guard and active duty troops in the Hurricane Katrina disaster zone under a single commander appointed by the Bush administration.

    "If I had seen a greater purpose, if I had felt it would make an immediate difference, it would have been a no brainer, but by Friday, we had everything in control," she said in an interview in a trailer behind the state's emergency operations center.

    And, so, Blanco, 62, a former schoolteacher, homemaker and football coach's wife -- as unlikely a governor as any -- defied a request from the president of the United States.

If, If, If, If --- the most oft-repeated phrase of the Left, topped only by 'Halliburton', 'Blame Bush', and 'Karl Rove!', --- "If I had seen a greater purpose....", how cold, how heartless, how racist.

The MSM fails to report that The Army Corps planned to upgrade the levees but up until prior to 1997 was blocked time and time again by enviro-litigationists. Further:

    The lawsuit stated, "“Bottomland hardwood forests must be protected and restored if the Louisiana black bear is to survive as a species, and if we are to ensure continued support for source population of all birds breeding in the lower Mississippi River valley." In addition to the Sierra Club, other parties to the suit were the group American Rivers, the Mississippi River Basin Alliance, and the Louisiana, Arkansas and Mississippi Wildlife Federations.

    The lawsuit was settled in 1997 with the Corps agreeing to hold off on some work while doing an additional two-year environmental impact study. Whether this delay directly affected the levees that broke in New Orleans is difficult to ascertain.

    But it is just one illustration of a destructive river-management philosophy that took hold in the '90s, influenced the Clinton administration, and had serious policy consequences.

I'm sorry, does it appear that the above took place around 1995 and 1996, or perhaps even a few years prior to then. Who was in office then? Huh? Huh? Huh? I bet hearing a few utterances of "I feel your pain" said to the right Katrina victims would melt those cold Liberal hearts.

The current system in New Orleans was designed decades ago and has been shaped over time by past storms.


    Upgrading the system would take as long as 20 to 25 years, according to Al Naomi, the Corps' senior project manager for the New Orleans District.

Here's a first hand account of a New Orleanian and his view of preparedness.

Mayor Ray Nagin and Governor Blanco can take the largest slice of the Blame Pie.

Instead of focusing time and effort into actually helping those in need, the Monday Morning Hurricane QB's have chosen to play the blame game and spew blatant propaganda which they think will help them politically.

Again, a situation or circumstance - this time a natural disaster - and can the Left offer
one, single, solitary proactive suggestion that contributes anything to the compassion and aide to those who need it? No, they can only criticize because that's all they know how to do. It's how children, very young, immature and spoiled children, behave. None of us expected anything different from them, did we?

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

The U.N. - Jason vs Freddie XVII

Shhhhssssssh...I'm going to let you in on a little secret but you have to promise --- shhhhhsh! --- not to tell.

Here's another secret, but don't tell anyone.

And...and...Kojo drives a nice car too and it's not....shhhhssssshhh!.......it's not a hybrid!

And here's another secret that...that nobody ever, in their wildest dreams, could have imagined would happen. The U.N. was so flush with money they didn't know what to do with all of it

    [The oil for food investigation] found that the organisation was ill-equipped to handle the $64bn scheme and criticised the role played by UN Secretary General Kofi Annan.

    It also said the scheme provided health care and food for millions of Iraqis.

Come closer...closer....I'm going to whisper now...don't tell anybody anything about the above stuff, okay. It's a secret.

Even the Washington Pork Roast wrote about it!

The U.N. Corrupt? Really? Really? Really?

Kazaa Kontinued

The Kazaa Saga Continues. And Here is the story from yesterday, with the Kazaa decision handed down Down Under. Of course, all good, daily visitors to this blog would already know that, right?

Gilligan Gone; RIP

Rest In Peace Bob Denver.

Wow... just ... wow....

Bob Denver

Little Chocolate Bar of Horrors!

"Mad I tell you, that's what they'll say! Mad! That I was Mad for inventing the Exploding Cocoa Bar! Mad! Mad! Bwa-ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaa!"

    German saboteurs came up with several cunning plans to cause mayhem during the Second World War - including bars of exploding chocolate.

    The "slab of chocolate" hand grenade is illustrated in the documents released to the National Archives in Kew, west London, together with an explanation of how it would blow up seconds after the unwitting Brit snapped off a piece.

    "The bomb is made of steel with a thin covering of real chocolate," the note says.

Would you like a Bon-Bon, Mr. Bond?

MrsSatan Knows What's Best

MrsSatan wants to create yet another Bureau of Red Tape. "More! More Red Tape," she screeched as she rode away on her broom, her laugh leaving mortals horrified. And more Tales From the MrsSatan Crypt.

MrsSatan: "I will Rule You!"

Monday, September 05, 2005

Labor Day

I hope those who have today off are well, and that those of us not directly affected by Katrina are thankful for what we have, and can do what we can for those in need in Mississippi, Louisiana and Alabama.

* Foreign help and donations are helping, and it is appreciated.

* Indonesian Airliner Down.

* Remembering Rehnquist.

    "The chief was a lawyer's lawyer. He taught and inspired me, and all of his clerks, to read carefully, to write clearly, and to think hard. He will, quite appropriately, be remembered as one of the few great chief justices."

* Soccer hooligans kept home by voice "collar" verification. "No, really, I can't go to the match, I'm on bloody home voice monitoring!" "Can you hear me NOW?!"

* Kazaa hit by Australian legal ruling.

* When Ball Peen Hammers are outlawed, only outlaws will have Ball Peen Hammers.

Caution: Ball Peen Hammer

* Look, in the sky, it's...it's...SuperAspirin!

SuperAspirin from a 1973 file photo.

PGA's Deutsche Bank Championship Five Way Tie, as of 1:50PM CST.

Sunday, September 04, 2005


Back to home base, the Drake Estate...(yeah...) after leaving the cities and to my Mom's for her birthday. Spent time with my fratello (brother) Pauli, a 'made man' in the Mafia. Should I be writing that?

I watched a lot of hurricane Katrina coverage and can only add that to those who criticize what they misperceive as a slow response by the Bush Administration don't fully grasp the enormity, magnitude and severity of Katrina.

While traveling between Friday and today I had plenty of time to listen to the truck radio. On Public Radio, of all places, one program had a review of the weather and warnings of how quickly Katrina was downgraded, and then how it intensified in a short amount of time. And that it unexpectedly - from previous tracking - went eastward.

The Salvation Army is accepting donations for hurricane victims. Other relief organizations are located HERE as well.

And by no means last, the The MDA Telethon
kicks off tonight going into Monday, Labor Day.

If you're traveling over the holiday, travel safely.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Castrati Boi Is (Was?) Sick - "Oh, Dat's So Sad!"

There was a "Best Of" Castrati Boi on Monday night and I forget if it was another rerun Tuesday night, or if he had someone sitting in for him. I hate even writing about the anti-Semitic Dumb Ass - you know, giving him any publicity at all - but it looks like the Old Coot may be back on the air tonight (Thursday) to rant about "How Bush caused Katrina and hasn't done enough for the hurricane stricken areas. " Yeah, we know you are mentally ill Old Coot, but it's nice to hear you were physically ill as well.

Well, Old Coot, have you written out your check and made a healthy donation to an agency helping out with the victims of the hurricane? Has Ewww-2's "Mr. Africa" Bono put his money where his mouth is? What about the craggily faced actor previously known as Robert Redford? Can anyone tell me if The Fat Bastard has made a healthy donation yet? Has Mister Journalism George Clooney put the mirror down long enough to slap down a nice chunk of cash to the hurricane victims? Has Mr. Neocon, the man with the face like a metropolitan road map, Mick "Geriatric" Jagger pitched in for the hurricane victims? Did the check from Saudi Arabia (remember the "We're Saudi Arabia, and we're your [The U.S.] friends" commercials post 9-11) arrived?

And on a final note, I wondered who it was guest hosting the Castrati Show while he was out with apparently the flu. I looked her up, her name is Laura Flanders. (Ned vociferously denies any relation!) Man, the woman talks and sounds like she's got a humongous Hot Karl (if you don't know, look it up) in her mouth.

The Politicalization of Katrina

Of course the hurricane is all the fault of the Bush Administration, if you listen to the Left Wing Crime Families. Yes, according to the Lefty Lunatics, Bush and Company knew this storm was coming and didn't move quickly enough. On his Wednesday show, North Dakota's Air(head) America Moron Emeritus Fat Eddy Schultz said "the Bush Administration waited too long to do anything." Well, what is it you wanted them to do, Fat Eddy - predict the amount and severity of damage before it was actually assessed and known?

Fat Eddy also said women were being raped in the evacuated areas hit hardest by Katrina. Sorry Fat Eddy, but searches on Google, AOLsearch and Wanadoo resulted in
nothing, NADA, no hits, NOTHING. Nothing, the same sum as your legitimacy as someone who can speak the truth.

And of course the next issue the Left Wing Crime Families blame on Bush is the price of gas. Again, as I previously have written, I thought the Left
wanted increases in gas prices so people drove less, thereby "saving the environment". You know, gas and oil are evil according to these shallow minded individuals. The refusal to sign onto the Kyoto Treaty by Bush was looked upon by the LPOS Crowd as heresy!

The LPOS Crowd wanted to save the world by higher gasoline prices, the Kyoto Treaty, eliminating SUV's (but not their precious limousines), and convert the internal combustion engine to run off everything from cooking oil, cooking fat, manure and Ted Danson's hairpiece.

Of course, objective individuals know that kowtowing judges who rule favorably to environmentalists who fight oil and gas exploration is a huge part of why the price of gasoline is increasing. Not to mention that the last refinery built in this country and put into operation was in 1976.

    The last refinery built in the US was in Garyville, Louisiana, and it started up in 1976. Energy proposed building a refinery near Portsmouth, Virginia, in the late 1970s, environmental groups and local residents fought the plan -- and it took almost nine years of battles in court and before federal and state regulators before the company cancelled the project in 1984.

Don't want to believe that item? Think it's skewed? It's not. Here's Another. And Another.

This doesn't take rocket science to grasp, understand or search for. It's quite easy, just go to Google and type in the search words of "last oil refinery built in U.S." But that would be too easy for the Liberals, wouldn't it? That wouldn't support their hyperbole and distortion of the truth.

And I can't omit all the fuel additives that the Insane Liberal Posse had lobbied for year after year after year. California and Minnesota have some of the most strict regulations for adding, oh hell, I don't even know any more --- ethanol, cow farts, Ted Danson's hairpiece --- with the percentage of these additives ever increasing

Here's a piece by a raving Lib that had me doubled up in laughter so hard it hurt. Mr. Lindorff, what planet are you on, and can I have a hit of what you're smoking?

    "The destruction of New Orleans--a catastrophe far worse than anything Osama Bin Laden could hope to wreak"....

September 11, 2001 and Katrina are not even remotely comparable; not by a long shot. Comparing the two is what's called a Broad and Sweeping Generalization.

    "Then too, there is the gutting of the National Guard"...

The National Guard isn't "gutted" and plenty of reserves and manpower is available in the hurricane-stricken states.

    "The best way to protect America and its people would be for the U.S. to become aggressively involved in combating the global warming that ensures that hurricanes like Katrina will become not the exception but the norm."

Here we go again with "global warming" being the contributing factor to Katrina. Mr. Lindorff, again, I want a hit of what you're smoking!

If our polluting the environment of the United States is the causation for Katrina, Mr. Lindorff, then what triggered the Asian Tsunami? I mean, that region is far less developed industrially as the U.S. Or are you saying "we" are also responsible for the Asian Tsunami?

A cursory history of world tsunami's is located HERE. Note that three of the most severe occurred well before the industrialized world: 1755 off the coast of Lisbon, Portugal; 1883's devastating tsunami caused by the explosion of Krakatoa; and 1896 off the Japanese port city of Sanriku.

Man and our industrialized world didn't contribute to Hurricane Katrina nor is there any "butterfly effect" by fossil fuel emissions and the environment . Natural Disasters happen! Make no mistake about what the Lefty Crime Families are doing by politicizing Katrina. They are grasping at straws because their domination over U.S. politics is eroding away faster than the coasts of Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama.

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