.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Ten Tips For President Bush On How To Improve His Popularity In Polls

10) Have an affair with an intern. Let rumor take its course.

9) When making out with the intern, make sure she is wearing a blue dress and fire a shot of spooge onto said dress.

8) Declare yourself the United States' first Hispanic President.

7) Have Congress author a bill for the largest tax hike ever. Sign the tax hike into law. Later give speech saying, "You think I raised taxes too much? It might surprise you to know that I think I raised them too much too."

6) Rent out the Lincoln Bedroom to illegal aliens. Tell the press you are showing goodwill to our neighbor to the South.

5) Deny intern affair mentioned in numbers 9 and 10.

4) Put Laura in charge of a National Healthcare Plan.

3) Bomb Kosovo again, for the headlines.

2) Put out for debate what the meaning of "strategery" is.

1) Admit affair with intern but deny actually having sexual relations. Wait for spooge stained blue dress to surface.


Bush: "I see the joker behind me."
Bubba: "Hey George, I can advise you on how to deal with the intern accusation."
Bush: "Go Away!"
Bubba: "Vote for 'Hill in '08 and you get two for the price of one!"
Bush: "Security, remove this unregistered sex offender from here!"
Bubba: "Ah, C'mon, please let me hang around here."
Bush: "No!"
Bubba: "Spoil sport!"

©2006

Comments:
nice :)
 
"..fire a shot of spooge onto said dress... " and #4....i like. very funny.
 
Thanks Mike, appreciate it!

- - -

EC...same, same, thanks much! Glad you gentlemen liked it.
 
None of this is funny. All presidents make mistakes, and to keep rehashing the old ones is not helpful.
 
Hi...um...donna, is it? I bet you own a blue dress with 'crunchy' on it, don't you?
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home

eXTReMe Tracker



Web Site Traffic Counters
Alabama Internet

Listed on BlogShares

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

This site uses photographs and material from other sources in strict
accordance and compliance with Fair Use Section 107 U.S. Copyright Code.
All other images and content © 2005-2009 David Drake.
Not responsible for content contained at linked sites.

Policy on commenting:
- Anonymous comments have little chance of being published.
- Comments made on posts 60 days old or older have little chance of being published.
- Published comments do not necessarily reflect the views of this blog author.
- Discretion of publishing or rejecting submitted comments rests solely with the owner and creator of this blog.
- Comments that egregiously "plug" (i.e. advertise or promote) another site or blog will be rejected. This doesn't mean you cannot include a link to your story, blog or to another site, but don't go overboard.
- Profanity is not a disqualifying factor, but profane rants solely for purposes of profanity are unlikely to be published.
- The owner and creator of this blog is not liable or responsible for the opinions of those who comment.