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Saturday, April 30, 2005

U.N. To Assist Lebanon Elections

As if Lebanon doesn't have enough problems, now they have the United Nations aiding in their May elections. Can the retarded cueball James Carville be far behind?

Bride-To-Be Abduction A Hoax

Well, the world was ready to "Michael Schiavo-ize" the Groom-To-Be John Mason. But then, yes, the Dumb Bitch Bride-To-Be, Jennifer Wilbanks admitted the hoax.

Desert Cat has some good advice for John Mason...run! Run away!

Tom Cruise: Back In The Saddle

World famous superstar and 100% authentic heterosexual (just ask him or his PR people) Tom Cruise hooked up with Katie Holmes in Rome and made sure the press was present to capture a lip lock between the two.

Cruise is 42 (or at least that's what Hollywood tells us. Age in Hollywood is certainly a relative and flux item) and Holmes is 26. Huh, perhaps Tom has a little bit of the "Woody Allen dates embryo Syndrome"?

I don't know - I'm just guessing.

Friday, April 29, 2005

New Cabinet for Iraq!

Iraq gets new Cabinet.

And it's a nice one, too:



© 2005

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Pssssst! Wanna Buy A Missile?

Vladimir Putin defends sale of missile to Syria.




© 2005

Revelations: Omnium Finis Imminet

Rarely have I ever watched a television mini-series or continuing serial drama. I was a latecomer fan (the seventh season) of "The X-Files". And the best of "The X-Files" were the continuing episodes dealing with the Shadow Government-Alien Conspiracy, and - of course - any episode with William B. Davis playing The Cigarette Smoking Man, or more simply, the CSM - one of the finest villainous roles ever written for television, and played magnificently played by Mr. Davis.


William B. Davis as The CSM

I'm also a latecomer to "24",(this season), and I wish I'd have been with it from the beginning.

Which brings me to NBC's "Revelations". When the promos ran for "Revelations", it looked unique and, considering the promos were running while world coverage was on both Terri Schiavo and Pope John Paul II, and considering the subject matter of "Revelations", the end of days, I thought it was worth a look.



Bill Pullman


Natascha McElhone

First, Bill Pullman. This guy is one of the finest actors around. Physically, he looks the same, pretty much, from role to role. But he always, always becomes the character he plays. I can't say the same for "bigger name" actors like Kevin Costner, Harrison Ford, Michael Douglas, Tom Hanks, or Tom Cruise, whom I think never transcend to the believability of the character. When I see Costner, Ford, Douglas and the others, all I think of is "I'm watching big-marquee-actor recite lines they've memorized."

Bill Pullman is real, and, in my opinion, far more talented an actor than the bigger names I mentioned. And the casting of Natascha McElhone as Sister Josepha Montefiore is fantastic.

Last night was the third part of a six part series. So far, the episodes have had different directors. And what's amazing is that the visual look, texture, and integrity of the series as a whole has not been compromised by different directors.

I'm not going to write a synopsis of the show, or try to bring anyone up to date on it. I am amazed that a commercial network took the risk in giving "Revelations" the green light.

"Revelations" is undoubtedly theatrical release quality in every way: production, special effects, location shooting, set, design - there was no penny pinching in producing this series. But the story (six one hour episodes) simply could not be edited down into a length suitable for theatrical release. So when television does something this good, it gets noticed.

Television hasn't done anything this good mini-series-wise since director Franco Zeffirelli's "Jesus of Nazareth".

Other than that, the only thing this good I can recall is the first season of David Lynch's "Twin Peaks".


And for another fine performance by Bill Pullman check out David Lynch's "Lost Highway".


David Lynch

And please, after you've viewed "Lost Highway" three or four times like me, feel free to e-mail and tell me what the movie is about because I still don't know.
© 2005

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Short Sabbatical

I have some matters that are pressing and thus, am currently unavoidably detained. However, the most recent updates of Friday and Saturday, April 22, and 23rd are timely and appear below the rerunning of the original April 5, 2005 "A Fatwah, Foie Gras Faux Pas", which, is now posted below with today's date.

The Friday, April 22 and Saturday April 23 stories are below the "Fatwah Foie Gras Faux Pas" story.

Full time return to updating and writing should resume late Monday or Tuesday.

Thank you, and enjoy the Archive items as well, if you have not checked them out.

Dave Drake

A Fatwah, Foie Gras Faux Pas


Ayatollah Khomeini ----Salman Rushdie-- --Foie Gras

In 1988, Iranian Ayatollah Khomeini issued, what at the time was believed, to be a Fatwah against Salman Rushdie, author of The Satanic Verses. Recently discovered documents, however, reveal a startling fact. According to Jim McJim, of the Institute For The Arcane Unknown, after exhaustive study of the Farsi language, McJim has concluded that what the Ayatollah was actually ordering in his decree was for .."Mr. Rushdie to be pelted with Foie Gras."

According to Mr. McJim, it was a misunderstanding of the translation of both the written and spoken words of the Ayatollah. "The Farsi language is quite complex, and it was simply a matter of critical misinterpretation of what the Ayatollah said. It's rather comical now, that Mr. Rushdie was in hiding for years over what was a language faux pas over foie gras, and not a Fatwah," added McJim, snickering at his own joke.

Other peer groups have reviewed McJims' work and believe it to be one hundred percent authentic. "The eating of
Foie Gras was frowned upon by the Ayatollah, and he wanted Mr. Rushdie to know it," concluded Dr. Leather Hockleer, Director of the Clinic of Minutiae. "We have no reason to believe there ever was a Fatwah against Mr. Rushdie."

In related news, the President of France,
Jacque Chirac, retracted his previous statement calling for France to issue a "Foie Gras against Al-Qaeda."


Chirac: " France has no Foie Gras against Al-Qaeda."
(Disclaimer: All of the above is true, except for those parts which are not).
© 2005

Saturday, April 23, 2005

News Highlights

Italy's Silvio Berlusconi returns leading their 60th postwar government. He also created a new department called Development and Territorial Cohesion.

Ze French 'are 'aving problems and differing opinions with ze European constituzhun. Of course, we wish this tried and true ally nothing but the best.

London: Britain's Association of University Teachers are boycotting two Israeli universities and its fallout appears vicious.

Black Gold, Texas Tea: Part 2
- "Jed, Jed...come quick. They's think there's lots more oil up in Alas-kra! Jed! Jed!"

El Obesoto Maximus Capacitous turns 51 years old today. We could all rhetorically wonder what special birthday meal this Lard Lad will have to celebrate his fifty-one, ankle-crushing years he's been on earth, but it's probably safe to say that for Chubbsy Wubbsy every meal is a special meal.
© 2005



Friday, April 22, 2005

Happy Belated Earth Day!

Thank you, Earth!

News Highlights

German Cannibal gets Retrial. Recipe book due out in Fall.

John Negroponte was overwhelmingly approved, and this has to be good if it ticks off the Bitter Liberals.

Silvio Berlusconi gets to create government anew. Don Corleone blessed the new bourgeois.

Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin, apologized for his current troubles saying..."it's an unjustifiable mess, Eh, you know, Eh...". What's a Prime Minister to do?

"Waiter! There's chili on my FINGER!" Ah, the Wendy's Finger in My chili story proves to be but a hoax. Unconfirmed reports have Wendy's late, great, founder Dave Thomas gave Anna Ayala, the lady who made the whole thing up, the "raspberries".

Apparently people are dissatisfied with the postal service in Hungary. "Just sign right here for your furs, Mrs. Douglas."
© 2005

A Letter From Dan Rather: "SEEKING JOB"


Dan Rather, Former CBS Anchorman.

    "Help me. I'm like a catfish out of catnip; a whale without a fur coat. Sure, I can sit at home in front of my teleprompter and still deliver the news into the 'pretend' camera. But it won't be the same. I need my audience, I have the need to be seen.

    Surely there's a place for me at CNN. Some liberal, socialist producer, who has a slot open for a liberal, socialist just like me.

    The neighbors ignore me now as I wave and shout hello to them-over the fence; they used the listen. No more.

    The dog won't come when I call him. The cat...the cat has always ignored me. It's you, it's you the public that I crave. My friendship with Garry Trudeau means nothing...nothing! I'll give it all up if I can just get back on television on a daily basis.

    How old is Jon Stewart? He should be nearing retirement age. I could take over for him on Comedy Central. It would be a seamless transition from CBS. Or perhaps I could do a 'Chapelle'-like show, only from a Midwest, Texas boy point of view. Yee Haw - THAT would be funny.

    I could go the route of Bill Moyers, Alan Alda, and Charlie Rose and PBS will hire me! I could do the news on 'Sesame Street'. I could appear on 'Zoboomafo'; or maybe even be a new Teletubbie, 'Danski'.

    Yes, I realize my possibilities are endless now, in what I can do. So if you wouldn't mind, give me a call. And, as always, Courage. Blinding, raging Courage. Courage. Courage. Courage."

    Thanks,
    Dan

© 2005 [All of the above is true, except for those parts which are not.]

Blogworthy

Noahware notes what only can be a good thing for both species, the insurance company, and that insidious little reptile.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Italy's Berlusconi Resigns

Says will start new coalition. Wants to continue as Premier.

Silvio Berlusconi

Jim Jeffords: "My last term."

Turncoat Jim Jeffords has decided to not seek another political term as the Senator from Vermont.

While he won't by missed by those who can count on the Right to do the right thing, and vote for what is basically the overriding will of the U.S. people, the best that can be said is he didn't become a full fledged lunatic liberal.

However, this does not prevent me from saying, in my best airplane flight attendant, those words we've all heard on departing our plane:


"Buh-Bye, now. Buh-Bye. Buh-Bye. Buh-Bye Mr. Jeffords, buh-bye. Buh-Bye."
© 2005

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Early Edition

News from overseas:

Republic of Georgia - President Bush received a compliment from Konstantin Kosachev, Chairman of The Russian Parliament's Lower House Committee for Foreign Affairs. The President is scheduled to visit Georgia May 10.

Europe Says Stuff - Finnish Prime Minister Matti Vanhanen stated Europe needs to kiss and make up to the U.S.

Europe Says More Stuff - Greece's Prime Minister Costas Karamanlis says bold steps needed to make Europe a political force on the world stage.

Black Gold, Texas Tea - Much oil, more than originally thought, was discovered in the Rajasthan area of India.



El Obesoto Maximus Capacitous - The Feeding Continues

The Waddling Wad of Lard stops feeding his face long enough to write a letter, the below posted on his site:

The Pope of Pie Town: El Obesoto Maximus Capacitious
© 2005


Twenty Four

Geeez, Ican't be the only one who enjoyed seeing Jack Bauer crack the fingers of a enemy combatant during an "interrogation", on 24 last night, can I? Just think of the info he could have obtained had he put panty hose on the guy's head!

Jack Bauer, Kiefer Sutherland
© 2005 (Hopefully more to post later this evening.)

Sunday, April 17, 2005

First Timer-Novice Takes NASCAR

Fort Worth, Texas - Leaving professionals, amateurs, on-lookers, and participants stunned and with their jaws on the asphalt, veteran actor and race car first-timer George Kennedy, had the crowd at the Samsung/RadioShack 500 shocked in silence as he roared across the finish line in his 1972 Buick Riviera.

"I was bored to death when I woke up this morning," said Kennedy. "I really didn't have anything planned for the day, so I made a few calls to some people I know, and asked them if I could enter the race. Well, the rest is history."

Kasey Kahne, who finished third today was both impressed and happy to see Kennedy win. "It just goes to show you that this is a sport for everybody, and on any given Sunday, anyone can win."


George Kennedy

Kennedy, whose films include "Cool Hand Luke", "Dirty Dingus Magee", and the "Airport" and "Naked Gun" films and their sequels, decided to enter the race using his normal, everyday car. "The biggest trouble when we'd pit is readjusting the lumbar back support," Kennedy laughed. "Actually, I wasn't sure I'd be able to make up the laps I lost when I pitted for those roast beef sandwiches, but I was really hungry and knew I couldn't make it to the end without eating."

Asked if he has any plans to continue racing Kennedy replied, "no, once is enough. I won today and that was great. I had a good time. But I want to leave racing to the Jeff Gordons and the Jimmie Johnsons."
© 2005

Barney Frank To Publish Children's Book of Tongue Twisters

In an exclusive report, this site has learned Knoopf Publishing is scheduled to release this summer, a book written by Congressman Barney Frank. The book is said to be a favorite subject of Frank, that being tongue twisters. Excerpts from the soon-to-be-published book appear below.


Spbarney Sprank
© 2005

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Amber Alert: Flu Virus Missing!


Milk Carton ----- Missing Flu Virus

This isn't funny. In the hands of a terrorist, or lunatic, or a Rabid, Ravenous Bitter Liberal, the results could be downright apocryphal.

However, authorities have asked for your help. If you see the
missing flu virus, please contact the nearest law authority.
© 2005

Dolphin + Whale = ?

A hybrid offspring of a dolphin and whale was born in captivity on December 23, 2004. Sure is a cutie, huh?

The zoo took a while before
announcing it.

It's called a Wolphin.

Upon hearing this news,
El Obesoto Maximus Capacitous (aka Michael Moore) called the creature "lunch".
© 2005

In Other Animal Hybrid News....

A new breed of dog has been discovered called the Jewdle.
© 2005

Friday, April 15, 2005

PETA Ridiculed ... Me, Happy!

People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals were mixin' it up again, this time, down in Texas, which probably isn't the best state to be a PETA protestor, considering how much of a "meat" state it is. Nevertheless, this doesn't deter PETA from their annoying, gnat-like presence.

Gilberto Salinas has the story in
The Brownsville Herald.

Some quotable excerpts

    “I don’t know about you, but I want my chicken to be cut in the throat, hung upside down and bled to death,” Ingersoll said. “I don’t want no chicken that has been gassed. Chickens are not gassed in the farm.”

Yes, I agree, I'm sure they eat their meat in private. Hey, let's all honor PETA by throwing as much meat (beef, chicken, turkey, pork, and aquatic creatures as well) as possible on the BBQ tonight!
© 2005

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Robert Byrd

Presenting The Thread Count Senator!

We've certainly been hearing
Robert Byrd babble on and on lately, haven't we? Is he the Default Senator when Ted Kennedy is hungover and can't appear before the camera? And do they default to Byrd when Mrs Satan is busy in hell and can't climb up through the earth's crust?

So we hear from Senator "Bob" Byrd. Bobby, to his friends. The ex Klansman, you know. You didn't? Liberals so often overlook this fact about his life. Don't believe me? Well, try
this piece by Michelle Malkin. Want another source? Here you go.

And
another. The KKK note is at the very bottom, under his "We Stand Passively Mute" speech. Boy, if that isn't an oxymoron for you!

And another piece on "
the senator in hotel sheets".

And something I found, because you know
this is what the Left would do to the Right, if the situation were reversed.

So with that, I present Below...
© 2005

Labels:


The Klansman

(With apologies to the late genius George Harrison, "Taxman", and The Beatles)

Sung to the tune of "Taxman":
© 2005

Labels: ,


Blogworthy

Borrowing from Elaine in Seinfeld, and her term spongeworthy, - I find Neal's Blog a riot, especially his report on the Three Indicted in Terror Plot. Very Blogworthy, indeed.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Noteworthy Blogs

I've been reading Desert Cat on a regular basis, and am finally getting around to mentioning it. Desert Cat manages to combine news, Op/Ed, current events, politics AND...some neat desert photo's all into one blog. And it's done very well. Also check Cat's linked item on Terri Schiavo.

Brian at
New Eagle writes a wonderful piece: A Better World In Seven Easy Steps.

Brian is Guest Blogger at the
Arthur Chrenkoff blog so be sure to check it out.

Foreign News Highlights

A few interesting developments overseas that I have not seen covered stateside. Greece, Russia, and Bulgaria have signed an agreement for a trans-country oil pipeline. Hmmm, we used to be able to do that here until the environmental extremists took over.

The Belfast Telegraph reports on a series of nasty knifings that have occurred in west Belfast:

Ahhh, just when I ordered my plane tickets, New Zealand goes and bans Nitrous Oxide Dens.


The Oxide Family (Left to Right) Back row: Stella (Mom), Ernie (Dad); Front row: Timmy, Cindy, Grandpa Loopy, Grandma Rush, Ernie Jr., Moby.

© 2005

Monday, April 11, 2005

Rabid Ravenous Bitter Liberals

Friday, April 8, 2005, Air(head)America host Mike Malloy: ..."hell waits for Alberto Gozalez, Jr."...."Tom DeLay is a pig"....."I can't stand lying, sneakiness, or hypocrisy and the Right is full of that"...."They (the Right) are arbitrary in how they apply standards"...."I hate them (the Right) with a passion"....."They (the right) are pro-war and pro-torture."

Monday, April 11, 2005, Air(head)America host Ed Schultz: "Rick Santorum is a scumbag."
--
Post after Post at DemocraticUnderground, on the day he died, celebrating the death of Ronald Reagan.
--
The daily distorted lies from The King of Lies, The Lying Liar of Liar-Dom Al Franken.
--
Or any other of the many instances where the Left has been nothing short of a blood vengeance verbal attack on a conservative.

And how "They" would squeal if the words above were spoken about them by Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Michael Savage, Bill O'Reilly or any other of several conservative pundits.

And no links will be found to the sites of Malloy, or Schultz - or to their statements. If they archive their shows on their sites, and I don't know if they do or not, then the above statements can be confirmed. I heard Malloy and "FatEddy" Schultz make their statements live, on the air.

I'm amazed at how the Left, when they are a minority, they have ALL the answers! Yet, when they had the majority, the didn't DO ANYTHING with it. How many years did the Left tell us there was a problem with Social Security? How many decades! Now, within the last few months, the Left adopts a "there's nothing THAT wrong with Social Security" mantra.

Grasping at straws is what it's called. They have no plans. They have no ideas. They have no foresight. So what's Left (LEFT, get it?) for them do to? Attack the person; Attack, Attack, Attack. Call them hateful names. (You could argue that I do that here - but I don't think mine are hateful. Sarcastically Caustic? Sure, I'll take that! But at least my names are funny.)

And - simply put, it is scary that
so many people are already backing ...yes, I know...it is scary.....Al Gore....
© 2005

Labels:


Oh No It's...

A piece of lyrical satire at the expense of Al Gore, submitted by mrssatan associate S.T. Miller, a man who is always awake and sober, but never the two at the same time:

GOREZILLA (by S.T.Miller)

With a fumbling campaign and a terrible frown,
He watches as those poll numbers go down.
Helpless Buddhists in a temple prayin’ scream “My God!” as he horns in on them.
He picks up endorsements in a union town,
But still those poll numbers keep going down.



Oh no! They say he wants your vote.
Don’t vote Gorezilla! Yeah…
Oh no! There goes Pinnochio.
Don’t vote Gorezilla! Yeah…

(Background vocal over guitar solo: “lockbox…” “I invented the internet…” “No controlling legal authority…”

History shows again and again Vice Presidents almost never win….Gorezilla!
History shows again and again Vice Presidents almost never win….Gorezilla!
History shows again and again Vice Presidents almost never win….Gorezilla!

Copyright 2000 Pendejo Productions & S.T. Miller. All rights reserved.
[Very special thanks to bpb901inc for Gorezilla design. Gorezilla design © bpb901inc]
© 2005

Sunday, April 10, 2005

The Left Continues to Squeal

The place: Fox Sunday News with Chris Wallace. Senators John Cornyn, R-TX , and Cluck Schumer, D-NY, discussed the judicial nomination process deadlock and rules of the Senate.

Cornyn, like any Republican faced with debating the likes of Cluck, most of the time opted for the "sit and be silent while your opponent makes an ass of himself and digs himself deeper into a hole" strategy, and it worked well for Senator Cornyn.

With arms flailing, full chicken head-peck motions at full speed, Cluck was unable to restrain himself from repeated use of
cooling saucer. Cluck, I think you need a cooling saucer.

In related news, the Left continues to cannibalize their own, as Cluck and Mrs Satan, are furious with fellow Socialist Chris Dodd.

It's funny when They Attack Themselves, isn't it? We encourage Them to keep at it. Surely they will gain seats in Congress in 2006 by their methods, yes?
© 2005

Labels:


Minneapolis Star Tribune: "Verify? What Verify!"

It's not even surprising really, that the Minneapolis Star Tribune would run a story without bothering at all, to check, verify, confirm, and authenticate that the story is accurate, factual, and true. Good for City Pages for bringing this story to light.

The Man Who Would Be Tampon

Prince Charles Marries Camilla

The man who wants to be reincarnated as a tampon.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Red Lake, MN: Search Yields No Gun

No gun found at Red Lake School - To Reopen Tuesday.

CBS Cameraman Shot, Detained, Questioned

Was a CBS Cameraman working with insurgents?

Phizer Minus Bextra

Bye Bye Bextra.

Friday, April 08, 2005

Red Lake, MN Shooting Development

School reopening delayed in the Red Lake, MN shootings. Authorities suspect other students may have participated in the planning, and that a gun may still be hidden inside the school premises.

Under Pressure?

We all remember the Firestone Tire Recall of five years ago ? Well, the Safe-T-Fy The World Groups are at it again, this time, with tire pressure idiot lights and sensors, soon to be required on all passenger cars in a few short years.

I'm sure we all will pay as much attention to this new warning light on our dashboards as we pay to the Check Engine light when it appears. This is the answer to idiot lights.

Maggots - To Your Health!

Maggots are good for you!


Barney Frank

Thursday, April 07, 2005

News Highlights

The funeral of Pope John Paul II begins. And here.

Texas coach shooter apprehended.

An update on the
Prince Edward Island Sealers and Protestors. See below on April 2, under Pope of The People, for the earlier story.

For those who care,
an update on The Masters. And that would be golf.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

"Kal-EE-For-NEE-Ah, you are FAT!"

To my friends and family in California, which is a beautiful, wonderful state; you are now officially obese and inactive!

May I suggest this long lived, reliable and traditional means of tempering your
hunger pangs?
© 2005

News Highlights

Sadly, a U.S. helicopter went down in Kabul, killing all on board.

John Couey pleads not guilty in abducting, assaulting, and killing nine year old Jessica Lunsford.

Author Saul Bellow has died.

----
A very interesting piece on how much fun it must be as a member of the Senate or the House, and
spend loads of money that isn't yours, but you get to spend it anyway. The article hits some abusers on both sides of the political aisle, but really, isn't that what liberalism is all about - recklessly spending money that isn't yours?

However, one of the worst abusers is, you guessed it --
MrsSatan.

MrsSatan, the High Priestess of Damnation

    Three Democrats, however, are among the top 10 spenders with PACs: Rep. Steny Hoyer of Maryland and Sens. Hillary Clinton of New York and Ted Kennedy of Massachusetts.

    Clinton, on the other hand, uses 79 percent of her PAC disbursements on operations. As with Kennedy, most is for staff, direct mail and administration.

© 2005

Monday, April 04, 2005

Item du Jour

Seriously now...could anyone really fall for a Mushroom "License"?


"Take us to your Leader."
Hmmmmm...what type of rifle or shotgun do you take for hunting mushrooms anyway? I've heard if you wound one, and it attacks you, you stand ZERO chance of living. Brutal, brutal, blood thirsty, venomous animals they are. Or does one trap them?
© 2005

Gore-TV Coming To You Soon! Be Afraid!


"I want another Florida recount --(whine, whine)....waaaah....waaaaahh!"
From the man who invented the internet , now comes
GORE -TV
!!

"The horror......the horror........the......ho........rror..................."
(gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssp, thunk.........)

© 2005

Saturday, April 02, 2005

Pope of The People

Many people will call Pope John Paul II the "Pope of The People". No truer words could be written about him. I can't add any more than you can find out there, that's already written about him. I will say he Embraced Everybody; every culture, race, religion, color -- he Embraced Everybody.

I found a good picture of a playful Pope John Paul II, and I think he enjoyed his non-serious moments:


Pope John Paul II Dies


Newsworthy Items

Michael Schiavo plans to keep the location and time of Terri's burial a secret from her parents and family. Is this not even slightly strange and odd to everyone?

Reports say up to
twenty other kids in Red Lake, MN knew about Jeff Weise's shooting plans.

Sealers and Protesters Rocked The Vote off the coast of Prince Edward Island.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Sandy Berger and The Pesky Papers


The Hamburglar ---------- Sandy Berger

Another Clinton Crony pleads guilty. Anyone surprised?

Former National Security Adviser Sandy Berger plead guilty to removing classified documents, and later destroying them, regarding the Clinton administration's policy on terrorism.

Now, I ask you; if you inadvertently take documents you're not supposed to have,
why bother shredding them with scissors?

May I recommend .

What is it about anyone connected to the Clintons and their propensity for loving to shred documents?

In a related news conference, The Hamburglar stated emphatically that he is not related to Sandy Berger by blood, marriage, in-laws, or any other kin or relative. We believe you Hamburglar, we don't believe Sandy.
© 2005

Barbarella Backtracks "Betrayal"

Barbarella, also known as Jane Fonda, now says she regrets her Vietnam comments. She also reveals her participation in three-somes.

Oh that Barbarella! © 2005


The ex-Mrs. Ted Turner, in an earlier career life.

News Items

ABC News announced that Ted Koppel exits their network and "Nightline" at the end of this year. Why did it take so long?

And let's not ever forget, "Nightline" was born of the

Iranian Hostage quagmire of the James Carter Presidency
.

The Duluth News Tribune is taking heat for running an Op/Ed cartoon with overtones of the Red Lake, MN, school shootings.
© 2005

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