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Thursday, March 29, 2007

Polar Bear Cub Knut To Be Executed

Knut, the adorably charming and delightfully cute polar bear cub, who has captivated the world's attention, has been ordered to face death by the guillotine. Having been abandoned by his mother after birth, Knut was raised by humans at Germany's Berlin Zoo.

Recently, Knut was allegedly implicated in the death of a panda. Clearly Knut has worn out his welcome.

German President Eva "Shottsy" Heinlich-Goffgildersturm has ordered Knut to be executed on Friday by means of the guillotine. "Knut has ticked us off, mocked us and tried our patience for the last time," said Heinlich-Goffgildersturm.

Animal rights activists, who had been supportive of euthanizing Knut from the very beginning, echoed the sentiments of Heinlich-Goffgildersturm. "Frankly, we are tired of his cuteness," said activist Fudir Gongabong from his office in Munich. "Cuteness buys someone or something only so much time, and Knut has used up his nine lives. Off with his head! Achtung!"



"Tell the world my story," begged Knut.

©2007

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Comments:
Animal rights nazis want Knut dead because it's natural for him to die after being rejected by his mother. Isn't it also natural for us to eat animals?

Hmmmmmm.

I wonder what it's like to be an idiot.
 
Clearly Knut is a problem caused by global warming, and that's another reason he should be executed.
 
I think it's horrible that people would want an animal dead just for one stupid thing.
 
Donyelle - what I wrote was satire and fiction. However, there were those on the Left who believed that Knut should be killed rather than be raised by humans. These people are indeed crazy, insane and nuts. They are the ones who should be euthanized.

Thanks for visiting and commenting.
 
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