Monday, February 06, 2006
Gobel Warming
Scientists belonging to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, (IPCC), have renounced all previous assertions on the phenomena of global warming. What had been a popular held theory among the scientific community, that man made pollution is contributing to a general warming trend of the globe, has now been proven certifiably false.
Examples such as coal-burning power plants, automobile exhausts, industrial smokestacks, and other waste of the human environment do not contribute carbon dioxide or greenhouse gases as once believed. None of these elements or by-products has any contributory negative affect on the earth's temperature.
"We made a huge, incalculable error in all of our research," said IPCC Senior Scientist Jim McJim. "Although those of us in the scientific community are extremely well educated and highly trained in the earth sciences, chemistry, physics, and most of all mathematics, we are terrible, downright horrible, spellers. And that is where we made our critical miscalculation," stated McJim.
McJim continued, "the assignment handed down to us to research was actually that of Gobel Warming, not global warming. Well, since none of us, as I said, are very good at spelling, we just assumed our job was to research global warming. I guess the joke really is on us."
Celebrity George Gobel-Global Warming Confusion: Case of Bad Spelling says IPCC's McJim
Professor Leather Hockleer, Research Director for the think tank Gobel International, said "We were kind of wondering why, after all these years, McJim and the IPCC never kept us apprised of their research. We gave them an assignment to research George Gobel. Now it's perfectly clear why we didn't hear from them. They were researching the wrong issue."
McJim acknowledged that Hockleer is correct and issued an apology for the lack of communication with her organization. "Gobel, Global - they're so similar, we never thought it could have been anything but an assignment to examine what we thought was the earth and its warming trend. Now that we know it was a fact finding mission on celebrity George Gobel, well, all I can say is that we here at the IPCC sure have egg on our face."
McJim and his fellow researchers and scientists will begin anew tomorrow in their quest to define and refine the talents of George Gobel and bring their newfound information to the public as soon as scientifically possible.
©2006
Examples such as coal-burning power plants, automobile exhausts, industrial smokestacks, and other waste of the human environment do not contribute carbon dioxide or greenhouse gases as once believed. None of these elements or by-products has any contributory negative affect on the earth's temperature.
"We made a huge, incalculable error in all of our research," said IPCC Senior Scientist Jim McJim. "Although those of us in the scientific community are extremely well educated and highly trained in the earth sciences, chemistry, physics, and most of all mathematics, we are terrible, downright horrible, spellers. And that is where we made our critical miscalculation," stated McJim.
McJim continued, "the assignment handed down to us to research was actually that of Gobel Warming, not global warming. Well, since none of us, as I said, are very good at spelling, we just assumed our job was to research global warming. I guess the joke really is on us."
Celebrity George Gobel-Global Warming Confusion: Case of Bad Spelling says IPCC's McJim
Professor Leather Hockleer, Research Director for the think tank Gobel International, said "We were kind of wondering why, after all these years, McJim and the IPCC never kept us apprised of their research. We gave them an assignment to research George Gobel. Now it's perfectly clear why we didn't hear from them. They were researching the wrong issue."
McJim acknowledged that Hockleer is correct and issued an apology for the lack of communication with her organization. "Gobel, Global - they're so similar, we never thought it could have been anything but an assignment to examine what we thought was the earth and its warming trend. Now that we know it was a fact finding mission on celebrity George Gobel, well, all I can say is that we here at the IPCC sure have egg on our face."
McJim and his fellow researchers and scientists will begin anew tomorrow in their quest to define and refine the talents of George Gobel and bring their newfound information to the public as soon as scientifically possible.
©2006
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