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Thursday, July 09, 2009

One Hit News

Rick Astley is not dead. Repeat: Rick Astley is not dead. Copenhagen Post:

    British singer doesn’t give up on his fans and enjoys life while performing in Copenhagen

    As the world mourned Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett this week, fans of British singer Rick Astley were devastated to hear of his premature death in a Berlin hotel room.

    However, for a supposed dead man, he is very much alive and kicking and looking forward to his Danish performance on Friday as part of the Jazz Festival.

    Rumours fuelled by social networking and a faked news wire from a reputable news agency suggested Astley had died suddenly this week, but his manager addressed worried fans on the star’s website to bring clarity to the matter.

More details of the hoax here.
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Obama daughters Malia and Sasha once again shamelessly used as cheap political campaign props. Life in Italy:

    First daughters Malia and Sasha Obama became makers of Italian ice cream on Wednesday[.]


    ``They made the blackberry flavour and the banana flavour,`` said parlour owner NazarenoGiolitti, who said he had been contacted by the US embassy to offer the Obama girls the behind-the-scenes experience.

    ``Then they ate them with great gusto and they took some away to offer it tonight to their mother Michelle, who is passionate about genuine products,`` he added.

    Unofficial sources said Michelle and the girls may be planning to have dinner in a restaurant near the Pantheon that is a favourite with US government officials.

Of course, Michelle Pickles the Dangerous Washerwoman will select a restaurant that serves booze, as she did in London. (Whisper: Michelle has a drinking problem).
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UK Mom wants air guns licensed. Evening Telegraph:

    The parents of a Dundee boy, injured by a pellet, have told the Tele they are shocked and concerned at the availability of air weapons.

    The 14-year-old’s mum said she had been looking at adverts on the Internet and was worried by how easy air weapons are to get hold of.

    “They should definitely be licensed,” she said.

    On Saturday, she had received the kind of phone call no parent wants to receive.

    She said, “I got told my son had been shot. They didn’t know how bad it was at the time.”

    Initially a surgeon told her it might be possible for the surgery to remove the pellet to be done at Ninewells.

    The boy’s dad added, “That’s a sad time, when you get told he might need a big operation.”

    When it was established the pellet was quite deep in the boy’s chest cavity close to his heart, a decision was taken to send the youngster to Yorkhill Children’s Hospital in Glasgow, where staff specialise in operating on children.

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VOMIT BUG hits cruise ship. Evening Telegraph:

    A cruise ship at the centre of a vomiting bug scare was due to arrive in Belfast at the start of next month.

    But the vessel will now cut short its voyage in the Scottish port where it is berthed, its operators said last night.

    Hundreds of passengers and crew on the Marco Polo, which is in Invergordon, Easter Ross, have shown symptoms of norovirus and are being treated on board.


    Of the 380 people showing symptoms, 340 were passengers and 40 were crew members,

    There are 769 passengers and 340 crew on board and those not showing symptoms were allowed to go ashore yesterday after port health officials inspected the ship.

    Transocean Tours said the man who died suffered a fatal heart attack on board the ship yesterday.


    The norovirus is also called the “winter vomiting disease” because people usually get it during the winter months, but it can occur at any time of the year.

    It spreads very easily from person to person and can survive for several days in a contaminated area.

    The bug can also spread through contact with surfaces or objects that are contaminated, or by eating contaminated food or water.

Welcome to Raaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllph Cruise Lines.
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Villagers hold malaria activities, malaria awareness. Solomon Star News:

    LOTS of activities focusing on malaria prevention are taking place at three Guadalcanal communities today.

    That’s when the Community Based Malaria Prevention programme (CBMP) conducts a community exchange visit to Tamboko, Kakabona, and Tinaghulu.


    The country’s largest non-government organization, Solomon Island Development Trusts (SIDT), Primo Chapa of SIDTA said, [the] highlight of the day will be villagers putting on their drama and showcasing their village work to fight against malaria.

I want to personally see malaria presented as drama and showcasing. I'm bettin' it's good theater.
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Five deaths in Cessna that collided with flock of pelicans. Courthouse News:

    Five people died when an airplane collided with a flock of pelicans, and the family of two of them says the Oklahoma City Airport Trust, the state Department of Airports and Oklahoma City are responsible, because they failed to comply with federal aviation regulations.

    All five occupants, including pilot Timothy Alan Hartman and Rickie D. Sandoval, were killed in the crash[.]


    The Cessna Citation CE-500 jet collided with a flock of "very large" American white pelicans over Lake Overholser in Oklahoma City. The birds destroyed control surfaces on the aircraft's horizontal stabilizer, causing the plane to "immediately invert into an uncontrollable, nose-down attitude and descend at a high rate into a wooded area" about 3 miles from the airport, where it crashed and caught fire, according to the complaint.

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Are you ready? Because you'd better be...here comes the Memo-sphere. OhMyNews:

    We have a new medium in place, however, that multiple layers can co-exist at the same time and in the same space, where prospective landlords can claim multiple ownership according to the intended design of their target space. Geeks named it the “augmented reality,” but my favorite moniker for the new media space is “memo-sphere.”

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Kroger recalls contaminated popcorn seasonings. Red Orit:

    The FDA said the Kroger Co. of Cincinnati recalled Kroger Popcorn Seasoning Movie Theater Butter Flavored, Kroger Popcorn Seasoning White Cheddar Flavored and Kroger Fat Free Butter Flavored Sprinkles sold in some of its retail stores because they might have been contaminated with salmonella from an ingredient produced by a supplier.

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Man shows up late...and naked...for dental appointment. Seattle PI:

    STRATFORD, Conn. -- Police say a Connecticut man has been arrested because he showed up at a dental office naked. Police say 41-year-old Christopher Hoff, of Stratford, also was five days late for his appointment. Authorities said Hoff entered Optimus Dental's office Monday with nothing on. A startled female receptionist screamed, and he ran away.

    Officers went to his home, and Hoff told them he had been sleeping all day. Police took Hoff to the dental office, where the receptionist identified him.

    Hoff was charged with disorderly conduct, public indecency and failure to comply with fingerprinting.

Yeah...like he needed to be fingerprinted in order to be identified. Five days late and naked. I can't be the only one thinking he'd spent a few of those days snorting or smoking something that would cause him to lose track of time.

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Naked man in dental apointment!
That was funny stuff.
I dont GET why people aren't dying that are EVIL.

Naked and 5 days late for the dental appointment...yeah, I thought that was funny. We needed a good laugh. Glad you liked it.

Well, you know the old saying about why Evil people live so long: God doesn't want 'em and the Devil won't take 'em. It seems to be accurate, as far as I can tell.
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