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Thursday, December 06, 2007

Dave "Toothy Grin" Thune And
His Little Helper Monkey Jay Benanav

I haven't received a response from St. Paul City Council Member Jay Benanav with regard to This Post. I did hear from St. Paul City Council Nitwit Dave "Toothy Grin" Thune's office.

I probably won't receive a response from Benanose since he takes his marching orders from "Toothy Grin."

Oh, well - so it goes.

In honor of "Toothy Grin" Thune and Benanose, I thought I'd present the below items:

St. Paul City Council Members Dave "Toothy Grin" Thune (left) and his Little Helper Monkey Jay Benanav (right) discuss thwarting the city council party that had been planned to be held at Fabulous Fern's Bar and Grill.

Toothy Grin Thune: Thanks for supporting me in my childish and petulant behavior in not attending the party if it had been held at Fern's.

Helper Monkey Benanav: Anything for you Dave. Why, I want you to always think of me as the dingleberries attached to your anal hairs.

Toothy Grin Thune: It's good to have dingleberries. They help keep my enormous bunghole warm and cozy.

Helper Monkey Benanav: Anything for you Dave.

Toothy Grin Thune: Can you fathom the gall and audacity of Fern's owner to actually campaign against my re-election?

Helper Monkey Benanav: The St. Paul City Council Candidate's Cabal has no place for democracy or free speech. Who does the owner of Fern's think he is, anyway? We will not tolerate any dissent or rebellious nature from any voter.

Toothy Grin Thune: How dare the owner of Fern's campaign against me. Doesn't he know I'm entitled to run for office and sit on the council without question and free from criticism?

Helper Monkey Benanav: When will people realize that you know everything, Dave. That you are never to be questioned or doubted?

Toothy Grin Thune: If only everyone would understand my greatness and omnipotence.

(Sound Effects: CRASH, BOOM, THUD!)

Helper Monkey Benanav: What was that?

Toothy Grin Thune: Oh, there's still a few housing code violations I haven't gotten around to fixing. I think that was the attic collapsing onto the second floor.

Helper Monkey Benanav: I'd be only too happy to fix it for you, Dave. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Toothy Grin Thune: Jay, you're such a good little puppet and helper monkey - the best ever! I'd ask that you remain at my beckon call, ready to ask "how high" when I say "jump."

Helper Monkey Benanav: Absolutely, Dave. You are the entire reason that I exist.

Toothy Grin Thune: You know what I'd like for a Christmas present, Jay?

Helper Monkey Benanav: You name it, Dave. You just name it.

Toothy Grin Thune: I'd like a warehouse full of Mooring Rope. I go through a lot of it flossing my teeth.

Helper Monkey Thune: Consider it done, Dave...consider it done.

(The above conversation, of course, is fictional. Any reproduction of copyrighted image(s) is allowed under law by the Fair Use United States Copyright Chapter § 107: that use of copyrighted work is permitted for purposes such as criticism, commentary, parody and satire and that reproduction of said image(s) is not an infringement or violation of copyright.)

And then there is this fun little item from 2004:

Here is an e-mail reply from Dave "Toothy Grin" Thune dated July 12, 2004. He was responding to an e-mail from Sue Jeffers, owner of the bar Stub and Herb's.

Thune, responding to Jeffers' concerns of the No-Smoking Ban resulting in a loss of her customer base, writes:

    "I think you've been breathing too much frenchfry [sic] grease.
    We'll just ignore your bizzare [sic] and addled ideas."

    dave [sic]

The e-mail exchange is posted at Minnesotans Against Smoking Bans.

Perhaps if "Toothy Grin" didn't spend so much of his time insulting and intimidating the owners of legitimate and legal businesses, he might find time to learn how to correctly spell words.

"Frenchfry" ?

"Bizzare" ?

I don't know about "Toothy Grin", but I learned by the first grade that one should always capitalize the first letter in their first - and last - name. I guess St. Paul City Council Members don't need to be good spellers. Instead, "Toothy Grin" is too busy throwing his weight around, inserting and pushing his big, fat belly into the affairs of legitimate businesses and owners of private property.

Below is an unedited reproduction of the e-mail from Jeffers to Thune and Thune's reply to Jeffers, from the above linked item at Minnesotans Against Smoking Bans site.

Full size, easy to read version located LOCATED HERE.


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